Why do I continue to do this? It all starts out the same. Beautiful, stunning, wow your eyes, as they stare into them intently with a longing. A seemingly affectionate glow then tainted by the words: I want you so bad. That's it. That's the phrase right there that translates: run (v). I know it. That's the phrase that makes me no more desired then a lustful venture. Temporary and fast, that's what I am ... to three of them now.
No. More in the self-loathing, shame-stirring type of way. The way that makes you want to drown your hollow shell. Keep feeling it. And although I'm sure you're dying to know if I'm a freak and to what degree, the ways our bodies synchronize or don't, and if you'll want this again or if it was a mistake... I am panicking. I fear this is all some men see when they look at me. Especially when they look at me that way and say those words-- instantly, I've been launched into the 20's where I'm just a pretty face but, my words aren't warranted and my presence isn't allowed without male supervision. I wish this illustrated my pouting stance, but I'm not quite as fabulous. The reason I allowed this phrase to affect me is, because these are guys that meant something. Made me feel something and then made me feel nothing. My emotions are depleted and it makes me want to take a hiatus. Beyond the walls of a simple compliment is feelings less than lucky. No one's feeling lucky cake
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AuthorChef Steph cooking up trouble. If she can't find anything real, she bakes real good sweets. Chocolate really may mend a broken heart... Archives
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