So, I think it's time for me to share a story that's a little less white lace. The setting of the story is a coffee shop outside of Dallas. A cute, innocent boy that was delving into Corinthians while concurrently working on a script enticed my intelligence interest; I clocked out of work early, grabbed my scripture journal, and met him for coffee. When I arrived, there was a young, slightly more attractive, blonde guy pouring over his notes in the corner. I greeted him and instantly he looked up. He stood to hug me and gloated about how much prettier was than in my pictures. Then I asked him what he was working on and he kind of glossed over it and said he wanted to learn more about me. It turned from a projected Bible study to a slightly intense date. Which I guess is fine. It's not like I met him on a Christian site or anything. Then he gushed about his past... It rushed down on me like a waterfall straight from the top of a cliff. He talked about his cocaine addiction, then transitioned to his sex addiction... guys confession seemed to flow on and on and on. He talked about how he had spent some time in jail and how he came to find Jesus.
It was a lot to take in but with my counseling background, my face portrayed peace and overall that I was unfazed. Then he leaned in and grabbed my hand and asked about how I came to love Jesus. I told her less risky, less elaborate, less dangerous story and then the conversation turned to a place I wasn't prepared for. "You seem like the type of girl that's four pairs for anything." An obvious challenge wrapped in a compliment. "Go on..." my body language coaxed. "I bet you have a swimsuit in your trunk. My house is right around the corner and it's a beautiful day to go swimming." My adventurous side over-powered my logical side. Revealing that I had a pair of swim shorts in my trunk was the exact fuel he needed. Pulling me by the arm, with his Bible under the other, he led me to the parking lot. Slightly fluttering but pathetically happy that such a hott guy was holding my hand, I traced his every move found myself at my trunk. I told him I didn't have a top to swim in and can you guess what he said? "Oh that's not a problem I won't be wearing a top either." Responding with sarcasm, I told him that would not be happening. Regardless, I still ended up in his truck and on the way to this mansion of a house. It had to be at least 5 bedrooms and the pool was stone with intricate designs to match the frame of the house. He rushed upstairs looking back over his shoulder, tempting me to follow. He said he was getting his swimsuit. I soaked in the beauty of the floor plan and antique furniture as I followed the route to his room. My head started to calculate that there's no way he gathered all of this furniture and could own all of this. My first thought was roommates but then my thoughts were interrupted with his hands on my waist. Startled from my thoughts in my own little world, I looked up into his blue eyes. "What are you doing," I said. "Did you find your suit?" His smirk covered his entire face and his body kind of quivered. "I'm so attracted to you." Okay sir, I thought loud enough that my eyes almost rolled all the way back. He continued with the charade and managed to pull me into his media room. In the dark room, he pulled me towards the DVD slot and rummaged for a disc. "I thought we were going swimming?" I questioned. "Well since you don't have a suit, I would pull you in, so it's probably best that we just watch a movie." I had plans later that night and could not afford to get soaked from head to toe so I took the bait. "Well I definitely don't have time for a whole movie." "Okay," he said as his hand graced my cheek. "Gosh you're so beautiful." A phrase that rolled off his tongue so easily, I knew this was part of the script. He kissed me and for some stupid reason, I kissed him back. Then he reared up; his body pressed on mine and his kisses turned fast and wet. Trying to slow him down, I put my hand on his chest, which was perfectly chiseled I might add. A few seconds passed and he loosened his grip. Looking into my eyes, he whispered, "I can't resist you." I'm telling you, this whole thing was scripted. My response was interrupted by a bellow from downstairs, "John! John come down here please." My body froze. In that instant I knew exactly the role of that voice and her next line. Adjusting his pants, he made his way to the stairs and flew down them. I meandered to the top of the stairs, sweating. "Who do you have up there?" The parental figure demanded. Peeking her head around his toned body, we made eye contact. "Hi," I said timidly, waving a nervous hand. "Who are you?" I could feel my face turn tomato red. I wanted nothing but to push myself down the stairs and then run out the front door with bruises and scrapes. That way, at least I would have an excuse to hit the door running. I didn't even have my car. It was still at the coffee shop where I thought this was a Bible study. The voice and body language to match, conveyed utter frustration. "Oh, I'm Stephanie." Unimpressed, she continued, "And what do you do Stephanie?" The interrogation started, I could feel it. I slowly made my way down the stairs as I answered her slew of questions. One of which was: how I met her 20 year old son. Feeling quite dizzy and betrayed and homesick all tied into one, "I-" "We met at the coffee shop mom; we were discussing my script because she's a writer too." Not removing her stare from me, she stood in silence. Judgmental silence. "Do you need help with the groceries?" he directed at her with the gentle tone... one she couldn't deny. "Yes." She pressed her scarlet lips together, removing her polished fingers from her left hip, she made her way to the kitchen. It was the most awkward "good deed" I've ever performed... if you could even call it that. I was an intruder in someone else's home- no, not to someone else- a minor. My head was reprimanding my absence of judgment as my body continued to bring in bags of groceries. "You have a lovely home," I muttered, forcing a smile. She didn't even acknowledge the statement. I looked to the liar whom offered me a half smile. I wanted to punch his pretty face. "Well, I really have to get back to my car to make my dinner plans." I didn't even look at a watch. I just had to get the fuck out of there. "Oh yeah, I'll take you." He said, smiling to his debutante-looking mother and proceeded through the garage. You damn right you'll take me; how the hell else am I supposed to get back to the coffee shop across six lanes of 1709? I screamed... within the walls of my mind. Once safely in the car, I let go of the breath I had been holding. Looking over at me he said, "Wow, I really like you." I'm sorry what?! You just humiliated me, lied to me, the list goes on- are you kidding me?! But of course, I didn't say any of that. Polite as can be, I smiled and said, "We'll see." Then he went on to say that he needed a woman like me to keep him from cheating and from hooking up with a bunch of girls. I was SO over this date, I almost rolled out of the moving car but, I didn't want to take that famous scene from Crazy Stupid Love. There's no way I could beat Steve Carell. I got to my car and could not have been happier! I certainly had a great story to tell my dinner plans that night! Oh yeah, he tried to bring me Starbucks on two separate occasions after this debacle of a date. It all started with the Bible...
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AuthorChef Steph cooking up trouble. If she can't find anything real, she bakes real good sweets. Chocolate really may mend a broken heart... Archives
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