Here's the scoop:I've gone on an astonishing number of first dates. It's not for bragging rights, nor is it a concealed part of my reality. It's quite apparent my candidness to these interactions because I learn from them more than More than half of them ended in disaster (which you've probably read about here, dripping with sarcasm and creative prose) and a quarter of them were either so sub-par on both sides, that we kind of mutually phased each other out OR they sprinted for the exit sign. If my memory serves me, a few even made their own exit: The remaining quarter of them turn into flings until the inevitable dismay. I'm not dooming these interactions, just illustrating my experiences... hence this blog of connection casualties. No bitterness here, I have found fruition in all of it; I actually appreciate singleness. It's a certain freedom I've never appreciated. Texting is a perfect example of this. I've developed a habit of allowing messages to build up like an email stuffed with too many subscriptions to stores, services, and interests. Messages sometimes go unread and unanswered for hours if not a day (or days if I'm overwhelmed). This would be quite a problem for a significant other, because there is a certain level of communication that must be maintained to cultivate and maintain a healthy relationship. Since I do not have my name or heart strings tied to anyone in my immediate present, some of the stress to change this and constantly keep up with my phone 18 hours a day, is alleviated. I am free to navigate my day according to the events that rise and be present in that moment whether it be working late at my 3rd job, getting a drink with a friend, or binge watching Parks until Leslie and Ben get together. This "freedom" is something I refuse to take advantage of :)) The art of adapting is key to each season you walk through in this beautiful life. And in a way, dating is a way to unearth the beauty in this world by sharing laughs, cups of Joe (or Joey: "how YOU doing?), interests, and overall, assessing long-term compatibility. People typically open a part of themselves when engaging in a potentially intimate relationships that they wouldn't dare release in a friend, professional, or sometimes even family interaction. You learn someone's perspective of the world based on their background, experiences, obstacles, and endeavors. I've tucked away life lessons, sticky notes of advice, and "what not to do's" from past dates and wouldn't undo them if given the opportunity. I'm sure I've provided more than enough of these (especially the negative ones because "a handful" is something I've been notorious of being... which, I'm kind of okay with. At least a guy will never get bored of me. Without a DOUBT. #believeyoume #cantbelieveitsnotbutter #stephyall #crazybutnotlazy #burstingwithemotion #inneremopunkrockkid #noeyeliner #converse&vanswillmakeherdance “You learn something every day if you pay attention.” – Ray LeBlond Even predate, I'm constantly scanning, analyzing, over-analyzing (yes, I am indeed a female) the words, the intentions, and the underlying meanings of the guys I engage with. I'm learning their humor, their pet peevs, and their reactions, which is ultimately uncovering the degree of his character. “We learn from failure, not from success!” – Bram Stoker “The more I live, the more I learn. The more I learn, the more I realize, the less I know.” – Michel Legrand “Life is a succession of lessons which must be lived to be understood.” – Helen Keller “The important thing is not to stop questioning; curiosity has its own reason for existing.” – Albert Einstein “I never learned from a man who agreed with me.” – Robert A. Heinlein “The beautiful thing about learning is nobody can take it away from you.” – B. B. King “Anyone who stops learning is old, whether at twenty or eighty. Anyone who keeps learning stays young.” – Henry Ford “The only true wisdom is in knowing you know nothing.” – Socrates “People learn something every day, and a lot of times it’s that what they learned the day before was wrong.” – Bill Vaughan “Vision without execution is just hallucination.” – Henry Ford “The difference between school and life? In school, you’re taught a lesson and then given a test. In life, you’re given a test that teaches you a lesson.” – Tom Bodett “I maintained my edge by always being a student; you will always have something new to learn.” – Jackie Joyner Kersee “Unless you try to do something beyond what you have already mastered, you will never grow.” – Ronald E. Osborn “The past can hurt. But the way I see it, you can either run from it, or learn from it.” – Walt Disney “There are no regrets in life, just lessons.” – Jennifer Aniston “The education of a man is never completed until he dies.” – Robert E. Lee “Tell me and I forget, teach me and I may remember, involve me and I learn.” – Benjamin Franklin "The day you stop learning is the day you die." -Michael Scott Well, I don't know necessarily to this extreme, but regardless, I'm not ready to die. "I don't wanna die today-- I don't wanna diiiiiiiie." Thank you, Logic. Ultimately, I am learning how I want to be loved and how to continue creating myself while loving someone without reservation. Sure, easily composed into print, but execution requires a certain level of patience and selflessness. These are both areas that need severe reconstruction and beautification.Ice Cream made by hand is the most suiting recipe for a fresh-take on dating. Pessimism flavor: discontinued.
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AuthorChef Steph cooking up trouble. If she can't find anything real, she bakes real good sweets. Chocolate really may mend a broken heart... Archives
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