Let's Pretend:You don't still have some of the best years of my life. I've had as much fun sneaking around in any setting than that dorm with you. Our first kiss didn't shock me to my core. Electrifying. Grr-grrr-grrrease lightening Our last kiss was something I thought would happen-- like we would die holding hands like in The Notebook. The end was only rocking-chair-rocky and that I was fair to you. I didn't keep your letters; every last one. I didn't hide the 3 scrapbooks full of memories from myself. I don't feel a sharp pain deep in my abdomen when I see your name pop-up on my best friend's phone. I've forgotten: the passion, the tears, the ambition, the phone calls, the encouragement to pursue our dreams, the endless laughter, the insiders, the adventures, the parents (all 3 of them~not including mine), the differences, the concerts, the chocolate, the plans... and how God had a different one in mind. The "me" we allowed each other to be were beautiful. I don't think I'll ever see that girl again and I can't pretend that's not a loss. A burial of the most powerful force I've encountered yet, and the dirt is still under my painted nails.. Sometimes, I acknowledge that's all I have left.I heard this song today and couldn't help but interpret it as his final thoughts. Maybe I'm no Selena, but boy did these raw words circle her in red. For awhile now, I've been trying to resist from checking on you. I know you're thriving and, I guess I'll have to leave it at that.Heat is out in the oven tonight, so no chance at 350.
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StephWhile bartenders are cute and witty, they are also paid to flirt and increase their tips. That's why you have to sift through the compliments and take your heart out of it. GAHH is that easier said than done. I constantly have found myself taking one little thing a boy did for me or say to me and create this fantasy of a life this could be. If a guy says he wants me, I believe he means for commitment. |
Slept in last night's clothes and tomorrow's dreams | The road outside my house |
Bring home the boys and scrap scrap metal the tanks. Get hitched and make a career out of robbing banks; Because the world is just a teller and we are wearing black masks. "You broke our spirit," says the note we pass
Take our tears and put them on ice; cause I swear I'd burn this city down to show you the light
You're just the girl all the boys want to dance with | Am I more than you bargained for..... yet? |
I'll be your best kept secret and your biggest mistake. The hand behind this pen relives a failure every day.
He introduced me to his friends, invited me to festivals, made beignets, slept over a couple times.... the list goes on. He was incredible, but I wouldn't let him make me his. At one point during our "dating season," during one of our countless heart-to-hearts he looked deep into my eyes and told me he could see that I didn't think I was beautiful. It was the most raw moment I've had with even counselors of mine. I'll never forget it.
That's the thing I've really learned about nice guys: they're everywhere, but not always where you need them to be. Physically, geographically, emotionally, mentally, even blissfully. Love, like life is about reactions to supernatural experiences-- any minute, any year. Love is so much more than finding someone that checks your boxes, makes you smile, or downright respects you. I haven't been able to wrap my head around it yet, but I'm finally starting to enjoy the ride.
Beauty encompasses this world, we just have to be intentional when seeking it.
Not all endings are quite that sweet.....
This is barbaric and I refuse to furnish a brownie recipe to this pan of ends..... since all these good guys from this series ended not in
happily ever after.
I'll always be imprinted by you-- regardless of what happens
You're different today and I know I'm to blame.
Butterflies are sleeping when I hear your name.
When you speak now i feel shards of glass,
I keep closing my eyes waiting for it to pass.
But the pressure grows sharper and it breaks the skin.
How foolish my actions to create the predicament we're in.
For there is no eraser and no way to revisit
The word-strapped weapons and what I did with them.
So, I guess it's best that I don't come over
And we can experience the thing they call closure
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Chef Steph cooking up trouble. If she can't find anything real, she bakes real good sweets. Chocolate really may mend a broken heart...
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